Yep, and today the score is...

                                                                           Anxiety- 10

                                                                           Kalina - 0.

Where Are You, God?

   Exploring different religions can be exhausting.  I keep learning more and more, but a part of me feels empty.  I long to find spiritual fulfillment through rituals like the ones I see others doing, but I have not yet found a home in any of the major world religions.  So I find myself watching others connecting with God from the outside, hoping that one day I can have practices that are sacred to me as well.  I know that I shouldn't have to wait until I fit neatly into an established religion to find God, but it seems so difficult at times.
   At any rate, it was these thoughts and feelings that led to me staying up later than I should have one night to create a "Connect to God" chart to provide a somewhat structured way(have I mentioned how much I love structure?!) to express my spirituality.

Your spiritual life need a boost, too?  Here's the deal:

1. Make a chart with ten pockets, come up with ten things you could do to connect with god, write them on  pieces of paper and place them in the pockets.  (Or, to save a lot of work, just write ten ways on index cards  and choose from the stack!)
2. Now put the chart on your wall, and with each project you complete, display it around the chart somehow. My first completed project was "Describe your current spirituality or faith.  What would symbolize it well?"  I placed my answer in an envelope with the star containing the instructions on top.  Other projects range from "Write a letter to God" to "Create a ritual and perform it."  Feel free to include pictures, drawings, journal entries, poems...anything at all in your display.  After all, it's a visual representation of your spirituality waking up and getting active.  

   I don't expect this chart to be my salvation by any means.  lol   But it is important for me to remember that I can find a way to live spiritually now and that I can have a spiritual identity whether or not I have claimed a religion as my own.

   What are some of your favorite ways of connecting with God?

"We are not human beings trying to be spiritual. We are spiritual beings trying to be human."  

-Jacquelyn Small

The Torah: A Whole New World

  

   Inspired by The Bedtime Torah, a book by Rabbi Bradley Shavit Artson that presents three takes on each of the Jewish weekly Torah readings, I have just read my first portion today.  That is not to say that I have never read any of the Torah before, but as a former conservative Christian, my understanding of it was much different.  I had always taken much of the Old Testament literally.  If it said that the universe was created in seven days, it was seven days.  If it said a snake talked, then it talked.  Until now, a more liberal approach had never occurred to me as anything less than heretical.

   In Judaism, it seems that the common view is that the Torah contains many legends and stories, loved and studied for their spiritual significance, though not always their literal truth.  I kept this perspective in mind as I read through Genesis 6:8; admittedly not the correct portion for the time of year, but if you ask me, the beginning is a good place to start.  After reading it, I headed over to Borders and, finding The Jewish Study Bible, read the commentary for that portion.  Taking in so many new ideas, I felt blown away.  Looking at the Torah as a sacred book, whose many meanings are locked away inside stories is drastically different from my former approach.  Instead of having matter-of-fact, hollow verses that bounce off of you and clatter to the ground, the Torah becomes beautiful, personal, engaging.  I plan to try to read the same passage the traditional three times over the course of the week, which seems like a great way to not only learn its content, but to let it soak into you and to find your own interpretations and meanings hidden away inside of it.  

   Though I hadn't thought of it before, the Torah is important not only in the Christianity I come from, but also the Islam I have been exploring, as well as, of course, the intriguing Judaism I now wish to understand, making it such a natural exploration for my spiritual journey to find me in.

Randomness

  A picture of yourself with ten facts:

            


 1. I married the love of my life 6 months ago.

2. I love to watch dancing, especially contemporary.

3. Reading is my idea of fun.

4. I just started voice lessons.

5. Religion/spirituality is my passion.

6. If I could be an animal, I would be a monkey.

7. I'm working as a cashier, but(besides being a mommy) I haven't decided exactly what I want to do "when I grow up."

8. I love Caribou Coffee's turtle and berry white mochas.

9. I'm becoming a decent cook, with my taco soup and sweet and sour chicken being a couple of my favs so far.

10. There is nothing in the world Rob and I cannot get through together. ♥